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Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Gender Swapping pt. IV: Star Trek


I'm specifically swapping the new movies, cause the characters in the films aren't quite what they were in the original series. I'd do the original series, but it's been a few years since I've watched those and even longer since I've seen The Next Generation. I probably wouldn't want to recast anything Patrick Stewart has ever done anyway.

James T. Kirk - Thandie Newton

 

I haven't seen Thandie Newton in anything and not loved it. I initially thought that she'd be great in an action role since she totally kicks ass, but after thinking about it for a minute (and discussing it with my sister and brother-in-law), I can't think of an action movie she's in where she's actually in an action role. Maybe it's been too long since I've seen some of those movies, but I can't think of anything. I think I probably want to see her in an action role, and that's why my brain thinks I have. Cause I do think she'd be awesome. I'm sure part of it is I haven't seen her in anything lately (the last movie I saw with her was RocknRolla) and I could always use more Thandie Newton in my life.

Spock - Claire Danes




Another person I need more of in my life. Plus, what can't this woman do? Can't you just see her Vulcan nerve pinching someone in the middle of a fight you know the other person will lose? I really want to see that now... I'll probably just watch My So-Called Life until that happens.

(Is it Vulcan death grip or Vulcan nerve pinch? I feel like I've used both terms in the past...)

Uhura - John Boyega




So, I've only seen John Boyega in Attack the Block, but I thought he was great and I've wanted to see him in anything else since. His character wasn't very...dynamic? He acted well, but his character was pretty closed off emotionally, so I guess we didn't see a lot of range. I could be way off base since it's been a while since I've seen it. Maybe what I'm trying to say is he can do the tough for sure, but I haven't seen him play snarky, which Uhura for sure can be at times. I have confidence in him though. Plus, he's 13 years younger than Claire Danes. I'm sure some of you are thinking what a huge and therefore gross age gap that is, but let's even out the age disparities among love interests in Hollywood a little bit. If we're expected to believe that Steve Carrell (50) and Olivia Wilde (29) are an item in Burt Wonderstone, I don't think Claire Danes and John Boyega would be much of a stretch. Don't see Burt Wonderstone, by the way.

Scotty - Jessica Hynes

It took me a good long while to figure this out because who can replace Simon Pegg? He's one of my favorite people of all time that I don't know in real life, but I'm pretty sure if I ever do meet him, he will live up to my hype. (By the way, I wrote this before I saw him up close at The World's End screening at Comic-Con. He exceeded expectations.) So there I was, scanning through the list of actors I have in excel for these posts ('cause I'm anal like that) and I stumble upon Jessica Hynes' name. Who else? She does drama fantastically, she's got the comedic chops, and it would be a fun nod to their beautiful partnership. 

Sulu - Ziyi Zhang



Equal parts adorable and ferocious. Although because Ziyi Zhang is who she is, female Sulu will probably be more insense than male Sulu. But I'm okay with that. If we're going for a grittier, more violent Star Trek, might as well go all out, right? I was also thinking about Dichen Lachman for the role of Sulu, but we need some more non-Americans on the Enterprise. Hell, let's make a few of these characters alien!

Chekov - Olga Kurylenko


This one was tougher, but mainly because I don't know any Eastern European actresses. Well, not none. My mind immediately went to Mila Jovovich, but Checkov wasn't known for his fighting skills. I know I've seen Olga Kurylenko in Seven Psychopaths and Quantum of Solace because I've seen both of those movies, but I couldn't tell you anything about her performance. Honestly, I couldn't tell you anything about Quantum of Solace because that film was a very forgettable one. Anyway, what I'm saying is I'm not married to the idea of Kurylenko playing Checkov. I just wanted an Eastern European actress who wasn't Mila Jovovich.


McCoy - Alex Kingston



She's fierce and has the subtle hilarity of Bones. What more do you need? And let's go ahead and make Bones an alien. I'm sure Alex would enjoy that.

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